Have you ever had those months when you’re riddled with feelings of self doubt, confusion, isolation, apathy, exhaustion, fear, feeling a fraud, even a bit of self-loathing and not feeling worthy or good enough?
Well I certainly have, and they’re not pleasant, are they!
But we need to accept that life will not always be upbeat, positive, energising and fun. It just isn’t possible or healthy to think that way. And our feelings are incredible indicators of where we are out of alignment, and also of what’s shifting.
Waves are like life
When you watch waves, the higher the wave goes, the deeper is the wake that follows it. You cannot always be on the peak of the wave. It’s just not in the nature of things. So when you are riding the crest, enjoy it, but know that there is a valley coming, and when that low does come don’t resist it. Accept that it’s there and take it as a time to rest, reflect or go inwards.
It might help to think of Flow as like a conveyor belt of life experiences. You are brought one after the other, pleasant and not so pleasant, like the peaks and valleys of the waves. And everything that life brings you comes from the Infinite Intelligence of Source.
Source knows what your highest potential is and all the experiences it sends your way shape you, grow you, strengthen you and guide you in the direction of being able to fulfil that potential. So every experience you have is valid and important for who you were born to become.
Watch out for the tricky antics of the ego
But it’s not so easy to accept everything that comes our way because we have free will and we have an ego, which is programmed to go either towards pleasure or away from pain.
On the journey of going for your dreams and goals uncomfortable situations come up and negative thoughts, feelings and emotions from the story you carry get triggered such as pain, shame, guilt, impatience, frustration, not-good-enough-ness, fear and so on. The ego will typically resist feeling those feelings, will try and push them down and do its best to distract you.
It will trick you into thinking you’re not in flow any more because things are no longer going well or as you wanted, which causes you to doubt yourself.
You become disheartened, or dis-connected-from-the-heart, and you cast around looking for answers outside yourself to find out where you went wrong or how to get back to feeling good. Then you end up making head-based decisions that might make logical sense, but just take you further off course.
Of course most of the time this all happens unconsciously.
Suppressing the uncomfortable takes lots of energy
Imagine the unpleasant feelings are like a cork that is being held down under water and out of consciousness. It takes a lot of energy to resist feeling those feelings, and when part of your consciousness is tied up with that it means you have less energy available for what you really do want to create.
So things that you’re resisting in other parts of your life will be having a direct impact on your business because it’s not possible to compartmentalise life from business.
To illustrate this, I was working with a client recently who had a VIP day with me to work on her personal brand. She is an amazingly talented woman, but because she was so good at so many things she wasn’t able to see her true brilliance that would bring deep fulfilment and joy to her life. And that was stopping her from making the impact she intuitively knew she was meant to be making in the world.
During the process I take my clients through she was able to connect deeply with her heart so she could see a clear vision of what she wanted that felt aligned and exciting. But although she had a clear vision there seemed to be a lot of inner resistance to moving forwards.
Through the day we did a lot of energetic clearing work, allowing the suppressed emotions from her old story to come to the surface to be seen, acknowledged, expressed and released.
When I spoke to her a week later she told me that an enormous amount of unexpressed pain and sadness to do with her mum had finally come out which she realised she’d been pushing down for a number of years. She spent the week in bits and exhausted, but she didn’t resist feeling any of it.
Once that had cleared she unexpectedly received a positive resolution about a major problem in her life that was connected to her mum’s situation and which had been consuming lots of her energy for eleven years!
Now she’s stopped trying to hold the sadness cork under the water she’s able to reclaim that energy and refocus it into what she really wants to create in her life.
It’s not our darkness but our light that we are most afraid of
I work with a lot of spiritual people who are in touch with their power at times, but who tend to have great dramas in their life. It’s all part of the ego’s master plan to keep you safe and small. It fears your power because that means change, and it loses control!
As Marianne Williamson wrote, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us…”
The truth is, you are not your feelings and you are not your thoughts. Your true spiritual nature is powerful beyond anything you can imagine. So when the Intelligence of life brings you a situation that triggers the thoughts and feelings of your drama it’s actually an opportunity to consciously allow them and release them from your energy field for good.
Give yourself permission to let the cork bob up to the surface.
Releasing the pushed down emotions
If you’re feeling lost, stuck or frustrated, like you’ve got one foot on the accelerator and the other on the brake, and you’d like a bit of help, I’m here for you.
Helping people find clarity, flow and releasing their energetic blocks is what I do best. So contact me for a complimentary Discovery Call so we can decide together what your next steps might be.
Don’t struggle on alone when you could be shining your light and transforming lives!
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Thanks Cathy – another great blog. I’m very good at trying to repress or change my life to avoid bad feelings rather than letting them be. I’m slowly learning that inner change does requires some transition time.
Thank you Thea. I think a lot of women also have the habit of putting everyone else first so it’s difficult to carve out time and space to do the releasing in a safe way or go and ‘treat’ ourselves to have someone help us release it to speed up the process in a more gentle way. It’s much easier to push things down just to keep things going as they were – but that takes energy, and you can be sure the universe won’t let you get away with it for too long before it gives you a nudge to open it up and take a look!