In this video (10 mins) I’m talking about how the transformational process is a bit more like a dance than a linear path.
We tend to cha-cha through life, taking two steps forward, one back, to the sides and forward again, and it’s the meaning we give to the experience that allows us to be in the moment and enjoy it as a dance, or get frustrated and disappointed that we’re not somewhere else we’d prefer to be.
So why do we go through this dance?
Watch or read the transcript below to find out!
Table of Contents
The transformation process is more like a cha-cha than a linear path
So why do we go through this dance?
Well, if you’re wanting to move forward in your life; to grow into new areas, to stretch yourself, to go for bigger dreams and desires, or simply to have something different than you currently have, then you’re going to meet some inner resistance.
Your programming from your conditioning and beliefs have given you an ego-identity, and your current life situation is a result of who you currently believe you are and what’s possible for you.
To make any significant transformation for the better in your life means you have to make an internal change to who you are being – and that feels threatening to the ego because it’s unfamiliar, and the ego’s job is to keep you safely in the known and predictable, even if it’s uncomfortable and even if your conscious mind – as well as your heart and soul – really wants what it wants.
So transformation is often a bit of a dance because the ego will try its best to convince you to stay where you are – or take a step back from the edge – while your heart and soul are wanting you to move ahead.
Typically – especially if it’s a big juicy goal – your head will fill with doubts and confusion, you might get distracted by other ideas that feel exciting, you might take too much on, leading to overwhelm that makes you want to put the breaks on, or unexpected life challenges appear ‘all of a sudden’ which take you off the course you were set on that had previously felt right.
When we eventually pause, and take stock of where we’re at and of our progress, it can feel really frustrating and disappointing or irritating, or even hopeless that we’re not further ahead. The self-criticism and negative head talk then kicks in…
Why doesn’t anything work for me? I’m so rubbish at this. It’s never going to work out. I’m not good enough. I don’t know what to do. I can’t do it. It’s too hard…
We all go through this at times. Often there is seemingly really valid evidence showing up in your experience that might give you a reason to give up on your goal. But that too is just the ego trying to sabotage you so that you stay in your comfort zone and you don’t change.
So really these thoughts are just lies, stories and misperceptions that were usually created by a child-aged part of us that were created way back, that have been running consistently in the background unconsciously throughout our lives. And the thing is, if you want to create change, you have to let these go, because if you continue to keep them running they will continue to create the same experiences.
These thoughts really were lies. They weren’t true then and they’re not true now. You are not just a small human in a body separate from everything and everyone, who can only make change happen through your own effort and willpower.
You are a spiritual being who has full connection to the unlimited creative power of the universe that is having a human experience. And you can harness this power of the universe to consciously co-create with it.
But you have to remember to ask for what you want, you have to believe that it’s possible for you and you have to hold focus and stay the course, so that no matter how long it takes or whatever fears or blocks show up, you’re willing to meet them and move through them.
You have to surrender and let go of the resistance to what comes up, even though at times it will be something that feels really real, uncomfortable, painful, irritating and often frightening. We have to allow the feelings to be felt, to be experienced, but to not buy into them.
When you surrender to this process, the patterns, beliefs and stories that have been pushed down inside of you rise up to be released, and as you do that, your vibration rises. You become a different person because you’re no longer the person that believed those things. Once you’re on the other side, those unconscious patterns have no power over you.
If you can let go of resistance to what’s coming up that you don’t like or don’t want, and instead surrender, allow, see and embrace all those challenging things as gifts from the universe – from an intelligent universe that knows exactly how to grow you into your potential and your highest expression; like it does with every living thing in nature – then you’ll actually begin to realise that life is always happening for you, rather than to you.
You’ll realise that there are no coincidences and that these things that show up seemingly out of the blue are actually gifts from the universe that help you grow into who you’re here to be. And when you do that it moves you closer to your joy… although obviously it doesn’t feel like that at the time!
At the time it feels like hell!
But if you can catch it and remember…
1. This is just part of the process.
2. It’s uncomfortable but it’s not going to last forever.
3. You just need to stay focused on where you want to get to, on your visions, dreams and goals.
4. Know that this is an energy that is moving up, out and through you that is based on old patterns, conditioning and beliefs that no longer serve you – it’s not real and it’s not who you are.
5. Not to buy into any of the head talk…
…then it can move out really quickly, although sometimes it takes some time.
It’s also worth noting that the noise in your head – created from all of these inner distractions and reactions as you move through this sticky, messy middle between where you were and where you want to be – is actually what stops you moving forward.
It stops you being able to hear the one clear thing that you need to do that will take you in the direction that you want to go in that your Higher Self knows is exactly right for you.
Those fear thoughts shout much more loudly than the whispers of your Higher Self. And this is one of the reasons that tarot is really helpful.
Breakthrough coaching sessions with tarot
I know many people are sceptical of tarot, perhaps because they feel there is some dark magical power in the cards, but really they are just a tool that helps you to access your unconscious mind through images and symbolism to activate your intuition and brings things hidden in your subconscious into awareness.
I don’t read fortunes or anything like that! But I’ve found it’s a great tool for helping you get unstuck, and combined with my intuition and many years of coaching expertise, it can really speed up a breakthrough.
Tarot coaching can be amazing because, not only will you be reminded of who you are as an Infinite Being and powerful creator, the cards really help you see what’s aligned, true and right for you. And when you see the cards in front of you mirroring your inner experience, you actually get a physical sensation in your body that helps you know what’s true.
They show you where influences are coming from other people and situations that you actually don’t even need to give any attention to, or guidance to move out of a field of influence.
The cards can also show you where you are taking stuff on from other people unconsciously that isn’t your responsibility. And when you let it go or hand it over, the energy that you’ve been using to hold onto it can then be put into creating your life.
So the cards are fantastic for giving all this guidance that will move you back into alignment with your highest and best path and into forward momentum, while taking fewer steps back and to the side.
If you’re curious and want to dip a toe into how tarot cards can help you connect with your own inner guidance on your own, there are various free apps and online resources where you can do different spreads depending on the kinds of things you have questions about.
Here is one I recommend.
Also, if you scroll to the bottom, you can download my free 111 Questions for Tarot, Oracle Cards and Journal Prompts, which might support you. It’s great for when you’re stumped at what questions to ask and is broken down into various areas of life.
If you’d like to book a breakthrough Transformational Tarot session with me, or receive deeper support to move through life and business blocks and get back in flow, then check out my Align and Flow 4-week 121 coaching programme.
Feel free to reach out for a no-obligation chat.
And if you’ve been doing a bit of a cha-cha yourself lately, and you haven’t been enjoying the dance, then let me know in the comments below if what I’ve shared in this video makes sense, and what you’re going to do to make some changes.
That’s it from me.
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See you next time!
Hello! I’m Cathy, I’m an intuitive transformational coach, healer and spiritual guide for women who want to live more authentically, more abundantly and more in flow by working with their spiritual power, so that they can create a life they love on their own terms.